Vegetarian Needs Help with Non-Veg Boyfriend
Loves being vegetarian, but boyfriend of four years is the king of carnivores! She completely supports him but he does not support her at all
When I was growing up, my family was extremely anti-veg. It was pretty much meat and dessert type thing.
Now as I live on my own I realize my love for being a vegetarian. My boyfriend (soon to be fiance) of four years is the king of carnivores! And I completely support him but he on the other hand does not support me in it at all.
He is in an Anatomy class and believes and has told me time and time again that being a vegetarian is “unhealthy due the the fact that the human body needs MEAT protein” as he calls it. I have told him that if its the protein he’s concerned with I can eat more protein based foods and even take protein pills…but yet he is standing solid.
Can you give me some actual FACTS I can maybe throw to him and show him I can still be a healthy human being without have to eat a cow a day? Especially any protein facts…
It would be most most helpful, thank you so much – Miss Vegetarian
Savvy Vegetarian Advice:
I’ve gotten quite a few letters like yours, and they always break my heart! This is an important relationship issue that keeps coming up for vegetarian women, and goes way deeper than who eats what.
The truth is it’s not about the protein. It’s about control – i.e. your boyfriend controlling you. You may not think of him as abusing you, or be able to accept it, but that’s exactly what this is about.
If you let your boyfriend dictate what you eat – you’re letting him decide who you get to be. Like most abusers, he’ll start with that and go onto other parts of you that aren’t to his liking.
Then he’ll start punishing you, psychologically at first, not physically necessarily, but it can easily progress to that. Even if you stand firm, he’ll always be chipping away at your self-esteem, and who you are.
There are lots of articles and advice letters about protein on Savvy Veg – here are a few that should be relevant to you:
How To Get Enough Protein In Your Vegetarian Diet
Protein Sample Menus
Plant Food Protein Chart
Veg Advice: What To Eat For Protein Besides Meat
But no matter what facts you have at hand to back up your choice – you shouldn’t have to explain your food choices to your boyfriend. If you do have serious health issues because of poor nutrition, that’s easily fixed without eating meat.
There’s plenty of info about that too in our nutrition report. A good book to have (and read and learn by heart!) is ‘Becoming Vegetarian’, the veggie nutrition bible, by RDs Melina and Davis. Every vegetarian should have a copy!
Please think twice about marrying your boyfriend! Your needs have to be met as well as his – that’s true in any relationship!